Second Short Essay on Smoking Bans

"How Far We’ve Come..."

by: Jack Spencer (artistic director)

This year marks the 72nd anniversary of the 21st amendment to the constitution, ending the prohibition of alcohol. And we’re all hoping that by it’s 100th anniversary, this news may reach BSU. Seriously though, prohibition is still alive and well. In fact the Prohibition Party is quite active. They currently have one elected candidate, James Hedges, who received 100% of the vote in Pennsylvania’s election for Thompson Township Tax Assessor. (96-0)

In the days before filtered cigarettes, before Joe Camel, before Menthols and Ultra-Lights, there was a time and place called the 1940's. During that time there were three makes of cigarettes on the market: Camel, Lucky Strike, and Pall Mall. With such little variety, one would think smoking a rarity. Yet, smoking was prevalent throughout the US. It was rare to find a person who didn’t smoke at all. The president smoked on camera. Camel filled the airwaves with advertisements like, "9 out of 10 doctors we surveyed said they smoked Camel Cigarettes, for the flavor."

Then in the 80's, something strange happened. With the advent of the compact or econo-car, that little triangular window disappeared from automobiles. This trend continued, and now it is as rare as the floor-mounted headlight dimmer switch. Could this be why smoking has gone out of the general public’s favor? When I travel to the Southern states, I notice that smoking is very much alive and well. I also notice that people drive many more cars with chrome bumpers, I-beam frame construction, and the little smoking window.

Anecdotal evidence for sure, but is that not the same kind of evidence the America Lung Association presents before congress?

Times change, people change(not really, but we’re still dumb enough to say we do), and trends change. That is to be expected, but where the hell did these anti-smoking nazis come from? There is a massive propaganda machine behind this movement, and it is fueled by none other than the insurance industry. Smoking is bad for your insurance company. Smokers in general, die before non-smokers. This means that life insurance(formerly death insurance) pays out more, before you have the chance to pay into the system fully.

Why ban smoking? Well it sure is trendy, and we sure like trends, just as sure as we hate Janet Jackson’s nipple. The Temperance Movement started as a trend, and it got its own amendment to the constitution. Who’s to say it won’t make a comeback?
With a firm grasp on the Thompson Township Tax Assessorship, what’s next for the Prohibition Party. A run for the White House in 2008? Or will the anti-smoking Nazis form a fascists party of their own? Hop on the bandwagon now! You may even get to take part in fucking-up the constitution.